i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
