the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize