I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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