It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
