He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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