Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
smell my finger.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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