spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
