I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.