he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize