Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
