Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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