that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
