there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize