Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
