my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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