marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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