I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
