Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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