no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
