I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
