absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
