its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
