This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
