sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
