Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
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you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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