she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
