We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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