omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
