Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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