Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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