she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Randomize
