He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
