I just cut my nipple shaving
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
