Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
