i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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