only if we run a train.
done.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
