I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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