It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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