I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize