let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize