Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex in a hospital.. check
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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