No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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