Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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