butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize