he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
