some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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