Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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