My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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