Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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