Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
So. Much. Porn.
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