I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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