i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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