Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize